Open Writing

It's been a long time since I last wrote, hasn't it? I don't know why I've felt too busy to write as I haven't been working.

I think I've been writing application forms full time, though, and all the scurrying round for Avon and doing the paperwork involved, is quite time-consuming, and then there were two job interviews, in London and Penrith, for positions on summer schools this year, but I was rejected by both employers..and so now I have a bit of a complex and lack of confidence and wonder if I'll ever get back into the mainstream of life again.

I feel like a sad goldfish blowing sad bubbles and looking at everyone having a party in the lounge where my bowl is. They all seem so busy with life and are enjoying meeting new people while I'm just flapping around growing older.

And then there's the sad story about my PGCE application. Well, of my first two choices, Sheffield rejected me and Manchester was full...and then of the next two Chester rejected me and Brighton's course had been cancelled...and I was automatically put into GTTR extra, which entitles you to call universities yourself for information.

I called round all of those still listed on the website as having vacancies, but the website obviously wasn't very up to date. Most were full!

Those which did have vacancies weren't interested as I got a third in my degree. Apparently the fact that my degree came from Cambridge doesn't make the situation better.

'I'm sorry, but we only accept candidates of the highest standard'
repeated all the pompous admissions officers...so, they consider someone who got a 2. 2 or 2.1 from a university/old poly with an easier final exam more able than a Cambridge graduate, who was predicted to get a 2.1 or 2.2, but got a 3rd after panicking in one exam (ironically the tragedy paper) and failing that module, and if you failed in one area, regardless of all your other marks (even if they were all 1sts), you were automatically cursed
with a 3rd. Not that I'm bitter in any way!

So what to do now? Only the University of E. London in Dagenham, Essex (which must be a dump with a name like that.. dumpy Dagenham has quite an unpleasant ring to it) will 'consider my application' in the general primary sector.

In the Upper Years category only Swansea (whose prospectus
was scruffier and less professional than the school magazine I used to write for, and, moreover, it was stapled together by a student with a hangover by the looks of it (upside down, back to front and stained with a coffee cup circle.)..yes, Swansea will 'consider' my application.

The next job will be to ring those universities offering a specialisation in French. There are quite a few of those left, unsurprisingly. But do children learn French in Primary
schools, and will a mere A-level in the subject be sneered upon as
'substandard'?

I do have one piece of good news, in that I have finally been offered a job in Spain for three weeks, during the summer. ..not much money but the school's in a place called Poblet, and on the website the school building looks like a fairytale castle, shining in the sunshine, peeping out of a wooded mountain.

I will be provided with full board in this. The course also sounds very well run. The children will apparently be practising their English at the lunch and dinner table and 'will kindly say please and thankyou to the teachers'.

The sample menu sounds delicious and gluten-free enough; lots of paella and fresh salads, and we get a free pass for a swimming pool on the local beach.

Sounds like a wonderful summer holiday does it not, but I imagine the
reality of the situation will be quite different, as I have had experience of summer schools before.

The students will no doubt not want to speak English in the classroom let alone at the dinner table, and will try and bunk off to the local disco or off-license after class instead of doing their 'activities.'

They will sleep in and be late for lessons and will be snogging one another in those pretty trees on the photos until after midnight. Someone like myself will have to pounce on them and escort them
back to school...to their OWN rooms.

What else? In my courses, I have now passed two modules for the computer course and am working through the last booklet. Desktop Publishing. I'm really enjoying this but spend far too much time flicking graphics in different directions and colouring them in luridly.

If the PGCE idea doesn't work I'm wondering whether or not teaching adults computing might not be an option. There is a big demand for computer experts and you can work with mature adults who actually want to learn...so what if I'm not exactly in love with computers?

I am also nearly at the end of the counselling course. I think I passed my final role-play assessment ok, in which I had to play the part of a counsellor and counsel a client in front of the tutor and the rest of the class.

I also think my essay was ok and should pass. Actually, I am coming
to the conclusion that no one can really fail these open university courses. They practically gave us the answers before the computer exams and my tutor didn't mind showing me some essays she'd written on the topic I researched for the counselling course essay.

Nor did she mind me stealing all her quotations and arguments and jiggling them round until they look different enough from her essay. I think attendance is the only requirement they have.

And what about that dating agency I joined? Well, Jamie Oliveresque
Nic from Leeds went away for Easter to visit family and apparently' has a few things lined up' for the next few weekends.' He did sound very keen to meet up, but maybe he just says that to all the girls and trots off to see a different one every weekend? Do I keep waiting or try and find another man on the net?

Well, that's all for today. Tomorrow I'm going away to Ireland for a week, with my parents. We're going to watch my sister being a bridesmaid at her friend's wedding. I have never met the bride nor the groom so feel like a bit of an imposter, but then a holiday in a place I have never been to, which holds the promise of leprechauns, hills and country folk, (maybe?) is irresistible.