Simply Sue: Sue's Universe
You don't need to fall down a black hole to find evidence of the existence of other universes, says Sue Papworth. For confirmation just look at the small ads in the Saturday papers.
According to the latest theories in astrophysics, there are probably countless universes around other than this one.
Well, obviously.
You don’t need to fall down a black hole to find one - there’s clear evidence in the small ads in the Saturday paper.
The other week, someone was selling a duck-filled quilt. Think about it. It’d keep you awake with all the racket, as well as waddling off in the middle of the night, and hopping into the bath. Unless you sleep in a very peculiar corner of the universe. Or a pond.
And as for the trench-coat with 50-inch chest that was an unwanted gift - who on earth (literally) gives a very large chap a coat he doesn’t want, and did they live to tell the tale? Where did it come from? What on earth will be in the pockets? Chewing gum and string, the keys to Pandora’s box - or a small second-hand galaxy that came free with the cornflakes somewhere yet unexplored?
Whilst the mind is in full boggle, it gets hit amidships with another unwanted gift. A hardwood exterior door.
“Hello, dear! I thought you might like - THIS!’’
“Er… Thanks. Um. Just what I… Well. Yes.’’
Where might you end up, if you actually walk through it? I’ll bet no-one ever heard from the chap who snapped up that bargain again. Even though it wasn’t that particular item that chanced to be “in god condition’’.
Whoever was selling The History of Rock, in mint condition, presumably had their tongue (and a pretty big humbug) in their cheek, and Sideboard Would Make Rabbit Hutch presumably comes from the same neck of the cosmological woods as the collapsible dog kennels. Somewhere, I guess, where collapsible dogs are as common as duck-filled quilts.
But the cocktail bar on castors must have been from somewhere else entirely. It has to be some kind of alien vessel in disguise, or an undiscovered life-form. Because who in this world would put any kind of bar on wheels? You rest your elbow on it - and end up prone, covered in cherries and little umbrellas, with the dratted thing skating off in the other direction and, presumably, going into orbit.
Around what, I would not wish to say.
