Fast Fiction: The Ken Blake Show
The first question on Ken Blake's first chat show could not have been bolder. Richard Mallinson tells another polished tale in few words.
The first guest on Ken Blake’s first chat show was Lelia Appleton, star of a popular tv soap.
The first question Ken asked Lelia was, ‘How many men have you slept with?’
Lelia looked straight at Ken and retorted, ‘How many men have you slept with?’
This seemed to stun Ken. He opened his mouth but no words came. He slumped in his seat.
Lelia took charge. She became, in effect, the hostess of the show. She asked Ken about his ‘tendencies’.
Playing the guest’s role, Ken spoke movingly, if vaguely.
In his earpiece he could hear the director’s vile expletives.
Next morning the tabloids splashed the story of the gay presenter who’d ended up as a guest on his own show.
The following week millions switched on to see Ken being role-reversed by another guest.
The pattern was repeated and before long the show was going out twice a week, to much acclaim.
The director glowed and spoke to the Guardian of ‘a triumph of conceptual thinking’ and to the Sun of ‘a hunch that works’.
He felt sure that he was in line for an award.
As for Ken, he was now both a celebrity (mobbed in the streets) and a cult figure (invited to address student unions).
However he did have one fear.
It was that the tabloids would find out that he wasn’t in the least gay and often had sex with full-bodied women such as Lelia Appleton.
