Arabian Autographs: Another Maasalaama
In painting a vivid and appealing picture of the friendships formed by ex-pats living in Saudi Arabia, Angela Townsend declares "I feel safer in the shopping malls of Saudi than on the streets of America.''
I recently attended a maasalaama (goodbye) party for yet another friend leaving the sandy soils of Saudi, in this case for jam-packed Japan.
After two years here with her husband she is looking forward to a change of lifestyle in the Orient.
There seems to have been an exodus of people packing up and moving on lately: their contracts have finished or they have had enough of the Saudi experience and it is time to go home or explore other more exciting options.
Despite what worried friends and family back home may think, it is not due to the ever-constant threat of terrorism that we are continually reminded of on CNN and BBC. Many families experienced the spate of compound attacks in 2003 and stayed on. Everyone weighs up their own odds armed with the true facts, not something read in a Western newspaper or broadcast to us by someone cocooned in an office thousands of miles away.
As for me, I have been here for one year now and am likely to be here for at least another one or two. I feel safer in the shopping malls of Saudi than on the streets of America.
Besides, our purpose here has not yet been fulfilled. Amer and I have visited the better-known parts of this land and a few far-flung corners as well, but there are still a few more to explore so, for the moment at least, I am happy to stay on.
It is a strange thing how quickly firm friendships are forged between expatriates. Anyone new to the compound quickly meets others on bus trips, at the supermarket or while hanging out beside the pool.
It is a sad when the time comes to say maasalaama. It is likely to be a friend you might have only known a few months or a year, but over that time have become as close as sisters.
This appears to be a phenomenon amongst the expat community, as well as military compounds, where friends are a substitute family while one is so far from home.
We spend a great deal of time with one another, with no commitments and so much spare time on our hands, and close bonds develop much sooner than they would with someone new in the neighbourhood back home.
Children's birthdays, new babies and holidays home are all opportunities for celebration and news of either travels quickly throughout the compound.
Many life-long friendships have been formed through the expatriate experience - desert camping under the stars, barbecues beside the pool and shop `til you drop expeditions (the female's specialty) - and the world becomes a much smaller place.
However, the Saudi expat life is not all wine and roses. Frustrations bubble to the surface in all of us at some time - homesickness, loneliness, `groundhog days' and a feeling of being `trapped' in the compound are common feelings - but they do pass.
Sometimes a short trip home is required for a dose of `reality' and to remember why the wanderlust developed in the first place.
Most return to Saudi with a new enthusiasm and appreciation; particularly those with full-time maids, nannies and cooks - these luxury services are simply not sustainable back home.
