Here's Alison: Just Like Me - Advice From Parker (The Cat)
"...For if your people like you, and love to hear you purr, you can bet your bottom dollar kid they'll comb and brush your fur...'' Alison Ross's poem will delight the millions of good folk who like cats.
If the Mongrel Mob invade my patch,
I'm vicious as can be,
I chew them up, and spit them out,
And that don't bother me!
But should a kitten wander by,
I take time to be a friend,
I warn him not to cross the road,
And meet a sticky end!
I sit out by the Power Pole
And he can hear me say,
These beastly cars will get you kid,
If you come out this way!
So he'll safely sit some meters back,
And look at me in awe,
As I sit beside the road,
And calmly clean my paw,
I like to talk in Meow,
And also ESP
I listen to their stories,
Which sometimes sadden me!
I try to give some 'Good Advice'
Warn him not to join the mob,
But find himself a 'mousey home'
And earn an honest bob!
For if your people like you,
And love to hear you purr,
You can bet your bottom dollar kid,
They'll comb and brush your fur!
They might even buy you 'Gourmet'
Or a tub of chunky Veal,
And share their bed on freezing nights,
And you'll know that you've done well!
So be a good wee kitten,
And you mind what I say,
Lead a good and sober life,
And you'll never be a stray!
Stay on the straight and narrow path,
It's the 'Best' way, you will see,
Don't let the 'Mob' recruit you son,
And you'll grow up 'Just like me'!
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