Here Comes Treble: The End Of The Line?
A memorial service to celebrate the life of an aunt directed Isabel Bradley's thoughts along sombre paths.
This week, I attended a memorial service celebrating the life of my aunt. She was ninety-one when she died, frustrated with a body that no longer worked, tired and possibly glad to finally lay down her head on a comfy pillow and give up the “good fight”.
As are all such occasions, this was a combination of tear-shedding and laughter. Cousins, who hadn’t seen each other since the last family funeral, greeted each other with delight then added swiftly-remembered condolences.
The Funeral
A funeral's a funny thing,
Where people laugh and talk - and sing.
The folks you meet
You haven't seen for years -
Beneath their smiles
are hidden tears...
I’ve watched people surrender their abilities, their dignity, their independence, to Time:
The ‘Cellist
See -
his hands
on bow and fingerboard
grow gnarled and sideways-bent.
Age creeps
silently
into his bones
Shrivels shoulders once so broad,
so sure.
His thatch of hair
his greying pride and joy -
scalp-showing -
Still slicked proudly back.
In his voice
quavers –
that once sang out in music -
quiver there.
The face of a stranger –
Age -
stares back
from every mirror he sees.
One of the deaths I’ve found hardest to accept was that of my father, in 1993:
To Dad
It's four years since you left -
left me to try to fly without your love.
Who would have thought life would be this tough
on my own - no-one to turn to...
You were old, and tired - how could I hold you?
Yet - now - I'm the older generation
I'm the one they turn to for advice
As I did to you - was it this hard for you?
There's no-one to turn to now
No-one to hold me and comfort my sadness
No-one to guide me through heartache and pain
No-one to show me how to pick up and go on again...
Only your memory keeps me going
Shows me the path I should try...
Only your memory holds me steady
Says - "go on, gal - go on!"
This raw grief left me eventually. I am grateful that peace, happiness and joy returned to my life, along with a deep gratitude that my father and I lived and loved each other for many years.
A few years ago, my uncle, the eldest of my mother’s siblings, died, going ahead to prepare the way for his brothers and sisters as he always did in Life:
Freedom
A cold, clear
pale and sunny winter's day.
At last
his fetters fell away.
The chains that bound
the bars that 'prisoned
All have gone...
At ten today,
My Uncle Donald passed away.
Death will, inevitably, come to us all:
Dying’s Fear
In dying lies no fear –
So many people do it
Every year!
Oh no
It is the “how”
The “why”
the “when” we dread –
The “where” we’ll wake up
When we’re dead!
It is a comfort to know that, when we’ve “made the crossing,” those much-loved people who went before us will be there to greet us on the other side of Life.
Until next week, “Here Comes Treble”.
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