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Blue, Green, Red and Purple: Heaps Cool...

It’s cool to be an old lady, says Betty Collins – but is it possible to be too cool?

It’s cool to be an old lady.
Nobody expects too much from you;
You don’t have to run up stairs,
or necessarily do anything much really.
And if anyone tries to put pressure on you -
there’s always : your: ‘Back’
or your : ‘ Feet’
or your : ‘High Blood Pressure’
You’re not as young as you used to be,
you remind them.
They see
that butter wouldn’t melt in your mouth:
and also
that not only is it impossible
but also horribly distasteful
if not entirely ludicrous and hilariously funny
for you ever to have considered anything like

(sssh)
“sex”
(sssssssh)

You could get away with murder
or any other crime passionel you fancy……
you’d never be suspected…..
In fact, it’s so cool, so heaps cool,
that sometimes you feel
just a wee bit chilly.

Especially when you recall
that quite a lot of your contemporaries
are already a whole helluva lot cooler –

pretty well chilled, in fact.

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