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U3A Writing: What's Good About Getting Old?

In this sprightly youthful poem Irene Grundy declares:

"Iím content as a senior citizen.
I donít want to be sixteen again!''

Peter asked us to talk this week
On the good things about getting old.
First a look back to when we were kids
And we had to do as we were told!

If you wanted to go out in high heels,
Wear make-up and outrageous clothes,
Your mum would look at you with scorn and say,
ďYouíre not going out in those!Ē

But as you get older and wiser,
You now know what you thought you knew then.
Your teenage longing for boys
Has developed for full-blooded men!

So you marry and life is idyllic.
The years hurry by and you find
Very quickly youíre suddenly ageing;
Your forehead is terribly lined.

As well as the lines on your forehead,
Other things have now shrunk and drooped.
And after two hours of housework
You find that youíre totally pooped!

The stairs are a bit of a problem,
Youíve got quite a pain in your hip,
And the creeping pain of arthritis
Is giving your fingers gyp!

So youíre old now. What are the benefits?
Letís take them in one by one:
Youíre free of the burden of children;
Youíre now free to go and have fun!

You donít have to pay for prescriptions,
So your painkillers come for free.
You can now have candlelit dinners
Instead of afternoon tea.

You donít have to get up in the morning;
You lie there all cosy Ė and then:
Oh! Iíve got to get up Ďcause itís Wednesday.
Iíve to go to Remember When!

No mortgage hung round your shoulders;
The house now belongs to you.
You can spend all your hard-earned pension
On whatever you want to do!

You can go on your yearly vacation
At any old time of the year.
You can drink as much wine as you like
Instead of a half pint of beer.

Then when it comes to December,
Because youíre now very old,
You get 200 pounds from the council
To make sure you donít die of cold!

If youíre stuck with the process of ageing
With a dreadful pain in your knee,
You can get a disabled sticker
And pack in the car park for free!

And another added bonus
When youíre as old as us Ė
If youíre lucky, a much younger person
Will give you their seat on the bus!

So weíre old now (some older than others)
And in spite of the wrinkles and pain,
Iím content as a senior citizen.
I donít want to be sixteen again!

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