Bonzer Words!: On The Move
...Psychiatrists and counsellors tell us that moving house is one of the most stressful events we face in our lives, next to the death of a loved one or losing one’s job. But despite that, Australians put themselves through the trauma again and again. Census figures show that one third of the population moves house every five years...
But Wendy Ogbourne reveals that no house move goes without a hitch.
Wendy writes for Bonzer! magazine. Please visit www.bonzer.org.au
We are going to move house again. I think I must need my head examined, but I can’t seem to help myself. Psychiatrists and counsellors tell us that moving house is one of the most stressful events we face in our lives, next to the death of a loved one or losing one’s job. But despite that, Australians put themselves through the trauma again and again. Census figures show that one third of the population moves house every five years.
The first move we made, and the most dramatic, was coming to Tasmania from the UK, 35 years ago. I believe that memory has kindly erased some of the worst moments, but I can still recall enough to make me wonder how I survived. Of course, I was young then. First, there was the three weeks’ stay with my in-laws after we had sold our house, before we were able to be on our way. They lived in a two-bedroomed council flat on an upper floor and we had two children of three years and six months. I have no idea how we all managed to sleep, but I know someone had a mattress on the kitchen floor, because I had to step over it each night, to warm the baby’s bottle. Since becoming in-laws ourselves, we can now appreciate the sacrifice that ours made for us.
When we finally caught the plane, our worldly goods followed us by sea. Due to a wharfies’ strike, it turned out to be ten weeks before they arrived. We moved first into a hotel, then a private flat, and finally into an unfurnished Housing Commission home with only the contents of the two suitcases we had brought with us. The Good Neighbour Council took pity on us and provided the necessities of bedding and cooking utensils. What a relief when the furniture van finally drove up to the door! The sight of the children eagerly unpacking their almost forgotten toys is one I shall not easily forget.
I truly believe that no move ever goes without a hitch. Since then, we have moved house five times, due to lifestyle changes. It always seemed like a good idea when we planned it, but not so good when the day dawned. All these things have happened to us, and I have no doubt to you too.
The double bed wouldn’t go down the stairs and had to be lowered over the balcony. I can’t imagine how we got it upstairs in the first place.
The youngest child refused to leave and was bawling his eyes out in his bedroom as the furniture was removed around him.
We couldn’t find the cat anywhere, so had to leave without him, and promise a distraught teenager that we would come back the next day and find him.
The car was loaded to the roof and standing in the drive ready to pull out, when it refused to start. Flat battery. Had to call the NRMA.
The furniture van arrived at the new home and had just finished unloading when we got a call from the Real Estate agent. There had been a hitch in the contract, and the property was not yet legally ours.
We arrived to find the electricity had not yet been reconnected as arranged. No lights, no heating, no cooking. We decided to dial a pizza. No phone.
The fridge wouldn’t fit into the space provided for it, despite having carefully measured beforehand.
We discovered that the previous owners had dug up all their most precious plants from the back garden, leaving a series of holes.
The removal van backed into the letter-box, flattening it.
To many inveterate house movers these traumas will long since have been given the status of minor irritations, and dismissed airily with a slight smile. But to the average family, they can leave lasting scars. It’s a bit like having a baby, isn’t it? Every time, when it’s all over, you lie back and sigh, “That’s it! Never again!”. Then, 12 months later, there you are, back in the labour ward, doing it all once more.
It must be a deep-seated need in humans to search for something better. Ever onward and upward. Or just another manifestation of “the grass is always greener the other side of the fence”, (more commonly known as “itchy feet”). Meanwhile the Real Estate industry, removalists, lawyers, insurance and stress counsellors sit back and enjoy it all.
©Wendy Ogbourne
