Yorkshire Dialect: Fowl Tactics
Mike Shaw's dialect tale involves a judge, and a couple of ducks.
Three on us wer walkin' raand t' village wen Ah asked t' other two if they'd nooaticed owt special abaat it thees days.
"Yus, tha's a job ter fahnd a shop 'at sells fresh fish," replahd Jack Bamforth. "Wen Ah wer a lad tha could get it at three or four shops. Naah tha's ter depend on t' green-grooacer gettin' some."
"Nay, Ah weren't thinkin' abaat that," Ah sed. "Wat abaat thee, Eddie?" Ah asked Eddie Sykes as we walked-past t' Rooase an' Craan.
"Ooanly 'at ther's plenty o' traffic," 'e replahd. "It's just lahke PiccadillyCircus sometahmes wen t' schooils are comin' aat."
"Ah wer thinkin' mooar abaat aah monny tahmes tha sees a bobby oh t' beat," Ah sed. "It must be months sin' Ah saw one walkin' raand."
Then Ah remahnded 'em abaat Sam O' Sid's, who 'ad a farm at t' top o th' ill an' wer allis i' bother wi' t' bobbies ower th' owd banger 'e used ter drahve raand in.
"Canta remember wen 'e fell aat wi' a neighbour ower some land?" Ah asked Jack. "T' bobbies kept aat o' that an' in t' finish t' dispute went ter court. A few days afooar t' court case Sam suggested sendin' t' judge a couple o' ducks, just ter sweeten 'im up lahke. 'Is solictor wer mortified an' telled 'im ter do nowt o' t' sooart, cos it'd be brahbery an' gooa against 'im.
"Onnyrooad, Sam won t' case an' t' solicitor wer fair puffed up wi' success.
'Ah still reckon it wer yond pair o' ducks 'at did it,' Sam insisted.
T' solicitor's face dropped an' 'e sed: 'You didn't send them after what I'd told you, did you?'
'Aye, Ah did an' awl, chuckled Sam. But Ah med sure Ah sent 'em in t' other chap's name, tha nooas.'"
