Open Writing

One neet, when Jesus 'ad finished preychin' ter t' crahds on t' lakeside, 'e said ter t' disciples, 'Come on, lads. Let's go across ter t' other side o' t' lake!'

Jesus wor in t' booat already, tha sees, 'cos 'e 'd been usin' it, as 'e monny a time did, as a sooart o' pulpit. Well, the' set off, wi' some o' t' disciples i' this booat, an't' rest i' two other booats.

Nah t' trouble wi't' Sea o' Galilee is tha can niwer tell when it's bahn ter bi bad weather. It's summat ter do wi' it bein' lower ner sea level — all t' air currents, an' that. Well, the'd got abaht awf way across t' lake when a wind suddenly gat up. Sooin it wor that wild an' rough 'at watter wor comin' ower t' side inter t' booat.

Nah, Jesus — no daht weary after preychin' ter t' crahds all t' day — wor i' t' stern o' t' booat, wi' 'is 'eead liggin' on a cushin, 'ard an' fast asleep. But t' disciples wer' wide awake an' flaid ter deeath on accahnt o' this storm. The' went ower ter Jesus an' started shakkin' 'im ter wakken 'im up.

'Maister!', the' bawled. 'Tha mun do summat! We're all bahn ter dee! T' watter's fillin' t' booat — an' wi s'll sink. Wi'll all bi drahndid!'

Jesus stood up an' seeamed ter bawl aht a sooart o' command ter t' wind an't' waves — an' by Gum! Bit bi bit, t' storm bated, an't' sea greew calm ageean.

Then Jesus turned ter t' disciples:

'Why wer' you lads so afeeared?' 'e said. 'Ee, deary me! What's 'appened ter yer faith?'

T disciples wer' still afeeared, an' wer' fast what ter reply.

'What sooart o' man is this?', the' wer' sayin' among thersens. 'Even t' wind an't' waves do as 'e tells 'em!'

Well, the' got safely across ter Gadara at t' other side, an' at fust leet, as sooin as Jesus stepped ashooare, ther' came runnin' up to 'im a wild-lookin' madman, skrikin' away at t' top of 'is voice, 'is long 'air streamin' be'ind 'im. What a flaysome seet! 'E wor clooathed i' regs, an' covered i' cuts an' brewses — an' 'e'd a length o' brokken chain fastened to 'is ankles an' wrists. T' disciples later fahnd aht 'at this feller wor that dangerous the' kept 'im well aht o' t' rooad i' this lonely place among t' tombs an't' caves. The'd chained 'im up, an' all, but 'e wor that strong 'e allus brok loose, an' rooamed abaht, day an' neet, rantin' an' ravin', possessed wi' terrible divills.

When 'e goes up ter Jesus 'e lets aht another 'orrible shriek, then thraws 'issen dahn i' front of 'im.

'Jesus! Son o' God Almighty!', 'e yells. 'What do yer want wi' me? Nay, dooan't punish mi, Ah beg of yer!'

'What's thi name, lad?' axes Jesus, talkin' to 'im same as if 'e wor normal, like.

'Mi name's "Legion"', says t' madman. 'Cos ther's that monny on us!'

'E meant, o' course, 'at 'e wor possessed wi' no end of evil sperrits.

'Dooan't send us away,' t' madman went on. 'Sither at them pigs ower yonder! Send us inter them!'

Well this gurt 'erd o' pigs on t' 'illside near t' lake — abaht two thahsand on 'em, ther'd bi — suddenly started rushin' abaht same as if demented. Then, bi Gow, the' ran dahn t' 'ill, all of a fullock, an' ower t' side inter t' lake — all drahndid!

T' swine'erds who'd been lookin' after t' pigs wer' flayed aht o' the'r wits, an' ran off inter t' tahn. The' telled fowk theeare what 'ad 'appened, an' crahds on 'em started comin' aht ter see what wor agate wi' this madman.

When the' got theeare the' saw im sittin' an' talkin' ter Jesus as calm as owt — an' nah 'e wor weearin' proper clooase, an' looked ter be in 'is reight mind. Well, instead o' bein' sewted wi' it all, t' fowk felt that uneasy they axed Jesus if 'e wouldn't mind leavin' an' goin' back across t' lake.

Jesus said 'e would, an' just as 'e wor gettin' inter t' booat t' man 'at 'ad been possessed wi' divills begged 'im ter let 'im come wi' 'im.

'No, lad', said Jesus. 'Thee stay an' tell all t' fowk rahnd 'ere what a wonderful thing God's done fer thi.'

So Jesus set off wi' t' disciples across t' lake, leavin' 'em all flabbergasted — all bar t' madman, 'oo wor feelin' nicely fer t' fust time i' years.