Laugh With Lisa: Kids Are Quick
Lisa DeMarco brings us a week's-worth of good chuckles with this selction of classroom humour.
To buy a copy of Lisa's book please click on http://www.strategicbookpublishing.com/servingupsomefunnyhtml
Teacher: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
Maria: Here it is, she says as she points to it in the map.
Teacher: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
Class: Maria.
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Teacher: Johnny, why are you doing your math multiplications on the floor?
Johnny: You told me to do it without using tables.
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Teacher: Glenn, how do you spell crocodile?
Glenn: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L.
Teacher: No, that is wrong!
Glenn: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me to spell it.
**
Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H I J K L M N O
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
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Teacher: Mike, why do you always get so dirty?
Mike: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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Teacher: Millie, give me a sentence that starts with “I?”
Millie: I is…
Teacher: No, Millie, Always say, “I am…”
Millie: Okay, I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
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Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted to it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father did not punish him?
Louie: Because George still had the ax in his hand.
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Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
Simon: No sir, I don’t have to. My Mom is a good cook.
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Teacher: Clyde, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
Clyde: No, sir. It’s just the same dog.
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Teacher: Peter, what do you call a person who keeps on talking even when people are no longer interested?
Peter: A teacher.
