Yorkshire Dialect: Me An' Mi Sleepin' Partner
"It sez 'ere 'at 'usbands an' wahves sleep a lot better if they've getten separate beds.
Mike Shaw's dialect narrator discuss sleeping arrangements with yar Ethel.
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Ah wer reeadin' t mornin' paper afta breakfast last week wen Ah spotted summat 'at fair grabbed mi interest.
"Jist listen ter this," Ah sez ter yar Ethel, who wer cleearin' t' pots off t' table.
"It sez 'ere 'at 'usbands an' wahves sleep a lot better if they've getten separate beds.
"An' this professor chap reckons they get an even better neet's sleep if they're i' separate rooms."
Ethel's first thowts are allis abaat brass, o' cooarse, an' shoo replahd: "Oh aye, an' jist think aah mich it ud cost ter bah single beds.
"Onnyrooad, Ah'm nooan ser keen on th' idea. Ah shud be wonderin' wat tha wer gettin' up to if Ah cudn't keep an eye on thee.
"It ud jist be lahke thee ter do summat daft if tha wer on thi own, same as smookin' thi pahpe i' bed an' settin' th' haas afire."
"Nay, credit me wi' a bit mooar wit ner that," Ah sed. "An' tha wun't be able ter yer mi snooarin' i' t' middle o' t' neet, awther."
Ethel sed that ud bi one gooid thing. "But Ah think we'll stop as we are naah, afta 40 yeears i' t' same bed.
"If tha remembers, Ah cudn't get off ter sleep yond tahme we 'ad ter 'ave single beds i' Scarborough."
Ah studied t' paper fer a bit afoor Ah sed ter Ethel: "Well, Ah'll tell thee wat Ah'll do. We'll stick ter t' double bed on one condition - tha'll atta knit thissen a pair o' bedsocks.
"Ah'm chock fed up of thee usin' me as a 'ot watter bottle in t' middle o' winter."
