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Yorkshire Dialect: Who Goas Theer?

Mike Shaw's true Yorkshire couple argue about canal towpaths.

It wer sich a nahce mild mornin' one day last week 'at yar Ethel suggested we should gooa blaggin' sooa shoo could mek some o' mi favourite jam.

We allis gooa ter t' same spot, daan bi t' canal bank, an' Ah'd spotted a lot o' big, juicy berries theer only tuthri days afoor.

As we wer walkin' up t' canal bank, Ethel gate on abaat this row ovver cyclists usin' t' towpath. "Ah reckon cyclists should be kept off," shoo sed. "Some o' t' younger end on bikes gooa lahke bats aat o' 'ell an' fraghten owd fowk aat o' ther wits.

"Tha can't allis yer 'em comin', tha nooas, 'cos ther's nooan ser monny on 'em 'at 'ave bells thees days.

"Wen Ah wer a lass ivverybody 'ad a bell on ther bike, an' we used it regular away."

"Aye, Ah remember that," Ah replahd. "But Ah'm nooan ser sure Ah agree wi' thee abaat bannin' cyclists.

"Wi a bit o' give an' tek, Ah reckon ther'd be room for booath. Ah know if Ah 'ad a bike terday Ah'd want somewheer besahdes Manchester Rooad ter rahde it. Wi' awl thees juggernauts an' watnot, t' poor cyclists 'ave nooa pleasure on t' main rooads."

But Ethel stuck to 'er guns. "Ah still reckon they shouldn't be allowed," shoo sed. "It should be fer walkers ooanly, then ther'd be nooa bother."

"Well, that's selfishness an' nowt ner mooar," Ah sed. "Ah suppoase tha'd keep horses off t' canal bank an' awl if tha 'ad thi way.

"That's a reight laugh wen t' bloomin' towpath wer med fer them in t' first place!"


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