Yorkshire Dialect: Ins an' Aats O' Telly Viewin'
"Tha'll be too busy gogglin' at t' telly awl day, Ah reckon. Wat wi' cricket, tennis, 'orse racin' an' World Cup fooitball, tha'r sartanly gettin' thi money's worth aat o' t' lahcence.''
"Dooan't worry, Ah'm baan ter do yond jobs i' t' garden. Sometahme, but not jist naah," Ah replahd. "Awl this spooart's too gooid ter miss."
But yar Ethel has a cunning plan to ensure that those gardening jobs are done, as Mike Shaw reveals.
Yar Ethel wer i' a reight grumpy mood whahle shoo wer dustin' raand wen it wer fair warm an' sunny aatsahde.
"Ah dooan't know wat's up, but Ah think tha's getten aat o' t' wrang sahde o' t'bed," Ah towld 'er."
Ethel gave me wun o' 'er mucky looks an' snapped back: "Sithee, it's reight grand weather fer dooin' a spot o' gardenin', but Ah'll bet tha'r nooan reckonin' on dooin' onny.
"Tha'll be too busy gogglin' at t' telly awl day, Ah reckon. Wat wi' cricket, tennis, 'orse racin' an' World Cup fooitball, tha'r sartanly gettin' thi money's worth aat o' t' lahcence."
"Dooan't worry, Ah'm baan ter do yond jobs i' t' garden. Sometahme, but not jist naah," Ah replahd. "Awl this spooart's too gooid ter miss."
Onnyrooad, afta teea sum reight black claads came ovver, it started thunderin' an' leetnin' an' by gum it din't hauf rain fer a bit.
Awl of a sudden t' TV screen went jist lahke a snowstoarm, sooa Ah thowt Ah'd better turn it off fer t' tahme bein'.
Wen t' weather cleared up ageean, Ah switched back on, but t' bloomin' picture wer nooa better.
Ethel stopped 'er dustin' an' sed th' aerial mustabeen struck bi leetnin'. "Ah can't repooart it till termorn, sooa tha mun as weel turn it off,'' shoo sed.
"An' naah tha's nowt else ter do, tha can get on wi' yond list o' jobs i' t' garden Ah gave thee."
Sooa Ah gate crackin' an' it wer ower an haar afoor Ah thowt Ah'd pop insahde fer a few minnits break.
As sooin as Ah gate insahde Ah cud yer voices cummin' fra t' front room, sooa Ah looked insahde an' theer wer Ethel, sittin' wi' 'er feet up an' wetchin' Coronation Street.
"Tha niwer towld me t' telly wer back on," Ah sed. "It's funny 'at it's gooan reight ageean on its own."
Ethel 'ad a funny little smahle on 'er face as shoo replahd: "Well, dosta know, Ah fun aat jist afoor Coronation Street 'at th' aerial 'ad cum aat on its plug. "Ah think Ah musta knocked it whahle Ah wer dustin'. It's eeasy done, tha knows, especially wen Ah cudn't stop thinkin' abaat awl them jobs i' t' garden 'at wanted doing!"
