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Yorkshire Dialect: Common Booan Complaint

Mike Shaw's dialect story this week concerns bone trouble.

Jack Bamforth an' me wer walkin' daan t' rooad t' other day wen we spotted Jooa Sykes in 'is front garden.

"By gum, Jooa dun't hauf put some tahme inta 'is gardenin'," sed Jack. "Nooa wonder we dooan't see much of 'im at t' club in summer."

"Tha'd be capped if tha did know aah long 'e spends on it," Ah replahd. "Ah can see 'im fra yar bedroom winda, an' sometahmes 'e's agate fra mornin' till neet.

"Mahnd thee, it pays off cos 'e allis does weel at t' looacal show. If Ah'm nooan misteken 'e won abaat a dozen first prahzes this yeear an' a few seconds on top o' that."

Jack nodded an sed a chap 'ad ter be dedicated ter tek 'is 'obby ter that extent. "It's a bit too much lahke 'ard work fer mah lahkin'," 'e added, just as Jooa came up ter 'ave a word wi' us ovver t' garden wall.

"We wer just sayin' 'at tha puts a lot o' tahme inta thi gardenin'," Ah telled Jooa. "Tha must be chock jiggered bi teeatahme wen tha's done a full day."

"Nay, it dun't seeam lahke 'ard work ter me cos Ah enjoy it," Jooa replahd. "T' missus sez Ah think mooar o' mi garden ner Ah do of 'er. She's reight an' awl, but Ah'd nivver admit it, an' dooan't you two gooa lettin' on to 'er.

"Onnyrooad, it dun't stop 'er askin' me ter look afta 'er brother's garden at Slawit. Ah'm just baan ter pop ovver theer in a few minnits. 'E reckons gardenin's a bit oo much fer 'im in 'is state of 'ealth. E's getten summat up wi' is booanes, Ah believe."

"Nay, tha'r nooan talkin' abaat Henry atta?" asked Jack. Wen Jooa sed 'e wer, Jack telled 'im 'e laiked bowls against 'im ivvery other week. "If tha asks me, yond booan trouble's varry common," chuckled Jack. "Ah know a few chaps 'at suffer fra it. It's called booan idleness."


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