Yorkshire Dialect: Sooa Poorly
Mike Shaw's dialect character is this week suffering from bellywark.
It in't often Ah'm sooa poorly 'at Ah've ter lig i' bed, but Ah wer laid up good an' proper last week. Ah felt as reight as a bobbin at bedtahme. Then Ah woke up in t' middle o' t' neet wi' bellywark an' feelin' dizzy.
Ah'd ter rush ter t' bathroom tuthri tahmes ter be sick, an' in t' mornin' Ah wer as weak as a kitten. When Ah trahd ter drag missen aat o' bed Ah just couldn't manage it. Ah'd nooa option but ter lig theer an' listen ter mi tummy rumblin'.
Yar Ethel reckoned it wer t' best place fer me i' that state, an' wen shoo'd getten dressed shoo sed Ah probably wouldn't want mi usual egg an' bacon fer breakfast.
"Too true," Ah mooaned, as Ah started gippin' just at t' thowt on it. "Ah maht manage a slahce o' tooast an' a pot o' teea, but that's abaat awl."
"It's probably a bug tha's getten," Ethel replahd. "Mary Jane daan t' street wer just t' same t' other week, but shoo wer back ter normal in a couple o' days."
Wen Ethel browt mi tooast shoo reckoned Ah'd nooan want much fer mi dinner, awther, sooa shoo'd mek one o' mi favourites, a nahce baked custard.
Afta shoo'd gooan back daansteears Ah musta dropped off ter sleep, cos t' next thing Ah knew it wer ommost twelve o' clock an' Ah wer feelin' a lot better.
Then Ah yerd Ethel cornin' upsteears an' Ah'd visions of a big slahce o" egg custard ter 'elp get mi strength back. Ah sat up i' bed waitin' fer 'er ter come in wi' it on a tray. But Ethel wer empty-handed wen shoo oppened t' dooar, sooa Ah sed: "Asta browt owt up?"
"Nay, yer daft 'ayporth, tha'r th' invalid, not me. That's just wat Ah wer baan ter ask thee!"
