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U3A Writing: A Yorkshire Wife’s Wedding or Fifty Thrifty Years

Vera Sanderson, in sprightly rhyme, tells of a Yorkshire couple who are cautious with their brass.

We didn’t want much of a wedding
For spending is always a curse
So we went to the church on a Number 9 bus
And hitched a lift back on a hearse.

We didn’t want much fuss and bother
For ‘fancy’ was never our style
So we donned Sunday best and beggar the rest
And trotted off quick down the aisle.

We didn’t think much of fresh flowers
For it’s wicked the prices you pay
So we nipped in the park and when it was dark
Made up a bridal bouquet.

We had an old ring from a ‘previous’
And said that would certainly do
He said, “Now you’re mine you deserve something fine.”
So we exchanged the old for the new.

We requested ‘cash only’ for presents
Corned beef salad and trifle for tea
Got a bottle of wine, which did us just fine
With small glasses it did twenty-three.

The cake was baked by Mother
That cost us nothing at all
She made us three layers; it lasted for years
Wrapped up in a tin in the hall.

We cut it up ever so thinly
And managed with only one layer
So the rest would come in for two christenings
Over the forthcoming years.

We’re two of a kind for saving our brass,
As tight as a kingfisher’s ear
For “many a mickle makes a muckle” in cash
And our savings grew more every year.

We keep a tight hold on our purse strings
We recycle and make do and mend
He’s the love of my life, he’s trouble and strife,
I’m his partner, his skivvy, his friend.

For there’s an old saying in Yorkshire
That “only true love’s for free.”
And so we got fat on plenty of that
And never went out on the spree.

I often regret being a skinflint
(Though old habits die hard in the end)
And I think I’m an ass for saving our brass
And any day soon there will be a blue moon
Then we’ll go on a spree, just him and me
And we’ll spend and we’ll spend
And we’ll spend.


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