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Yorkshire Dialect: Short Back And Sides

So what made Jooa Sykes rush off to get his hair cut? Mike Shaw tells another dialect tale.

Whahle Ah wer suppin' mi pahnt in t' club t' other neet Ah thowt ter missen it wer abaat tahme Ah gate a 'aircut.

Though Ah've nowt much on top thees days, ther's a fair bit left on t' back an' sahdes an' it felt fair ovvergrown in t' neckoil.

"Ah reckon it's abaat tahme Ah popped daan ter t' barber's," Ah telled Jack Bamforth wen 'im an' Jooa Sykes came in an' sat at t' sahde o' me.

"Thahne looks as if it could do wi' a trim up an' awl," Ah sed ter Jack. "If owt, Ah reckon it's even longer ner mahne.

"Mahnd thee, awl three on us owt ter be ready ageean cos we wer theer tergether, if tha remembers, just afooar Kersmuss."

Jack sed 'e'd just been thinkin' t' same, but wen Ah glanced at Jooa 'is 'air looked as if it'd nobbut just been cut.

"By gum, Jooa, Ah reckon thi 'air musta stopped growin'," Ah telled 'im.

"Nay, it's probably t' other way raand," 'e replahd. "T wahfe sed Ah favvered an aat-o-work violinist, sooa Ah went an' gate it clipped last week."

"Tha'd 'ave a job on, cost t' barber wer off awl week wi' t' flu," Ah sed as Jooa began ter look a bit flustered.

"Ah, well, Ah went ter yond shop at t' other end o' t' street," 'e muttered.

"Tha nivver telled us tha wer gooin'," Ah replahd. "Onnyrooad, yond's a unisex shop an' it's fifty pence dearer ner at yar's."

Jooa's face wer as red as a beetroot bi this tahme, sooa Ah winked at Jack an' sed, "Ah reckon ther's a bit mooar ter this than meets th' eye.

"Nah then, Jooa, atta sure it wer just a 'aircut tha'd i' mahnd wen tha mentioned trim ter yond young blonde in t' unisex shop!"


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