Yorkshire Dialect: True Yorkshire
Mike Shaw's dialect character thinks it is time the rest of the country knew the true nature of Yorkshire folk.
If ivver a little bit o doggerel did a looad a' damage it's yond daft rhyme they call t' Tyke's Motto.
Ah reckon, yer'll awl know wat it sez, but just i' case ther's sumbdy 'at duh't it gooas lahke this:
'Eat awl, see awl, say nowt,
Eyt awl, sup awl, pay nowt,
An' if tha does owt fer nowt,
Allis do it fer thissen.
Is it anny wonder them daan saath tek t' mickey aat on us wen they yer that.
Sooa Ah reckon we owt ter sing up, pay up an' cheer up ter show 'em awl wat Tykes are really lahke.
Nivver mahnd wearin' whahte buttonholes, scoffin' Yorkshire puddin' an' poppin' a garland raand a few statues lahke J B Priestley or Harold Wilson.
Ah think we should be gettin' tergether in us thaasands an' gooin' off raand t' country ter let 'em know t' truth abaat Yorkshire fowk.
Send th' Uddersfield Choral Society an' us male voice choirs far an' wahde ter show 'at us singers are t' best in t' land.
An' let us cricketers laike at Lord's an' us fooitballers at Wembley agen teeams fra t' rest o' England.
Let's empty t' Brooadv Acres fer once an' mek us awl ambassadors fer t' day ter prove 'at yond piece o' poetry's nowt but a looad o' rubbish.
Just ter do mi own littte bit towards it, Ah'm off wi' a few mates oyver Standedge inta Lancashire fer a chara trip ter Oldham an' Manchester.
We're tekkin' some o' t' Colne Valley Male Voice Choir wi' us, an' it's just a pity we can't 'ave t' trophy they won a few weeks back at th' Eisteddfod i' Wales.
Onnyropad, it's abaat tahme Ah gate on t' bus, but Ah thowt Ah'd let yer know wat Ah reckon we owt ter do on Yorkshire Day.
Oh, dosta know wat? Ah've just fun aat 'at Ah've gooan an' left mi wallet at wom!
