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Yorkshire Dialect: Ethel's Movin' Idea

Ethel makes a dynamic breakfast suggestion in Mike Shaw's latest dialect tale.

Ah wer lookin' aat o' t' winda wen t' rain wer teemin' daan at breakfast tahme.

"It looks lahke ther'll be nooa cricket terday," Ah sed ter Ethel, who'd just getten aat o' bed. "Ah reckon it's set fer t' day, sooa ther's nowt much ter do bar laiking doms daan at t' club."

Ethel came aat o' t' kitchen ter set table fer breakfast an' sed Ah could mooan fer England. "Tha'r a reight wailin' Willie if ivver ther wer one," she telled me.

"Ther's a few haars ter gooa yet afooar t' cricket starts. T'sun maht be crackin' t' flags bi dinnertahme."

"Ah reckon tha'r dooin' thi best ter get rid o' me sooa tha can get a couple o' t' neighbours raand fer a natter," Ah replahd. "Tha can see it's fair black over Marsden, an' that's wheer awl t' bad weather comes fra."

Ethel browt t' milk in off t' dooarstep an' called me a pessimist, born an' bred.
"If ther wer hauf a jug o' milk on t' table tha'd say it wor hauf empty asteead o' hauf full. Sit thissen daan an' Ah'll get thi egg an' bacon ready.

"On second thowts, seein' as tha'r a champion pessimist, tha maht lahke summat different. Wat would tha say ter a bowl of All-Bran an' hauf a dozen prunes on top?"


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