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Fast Fiction: Off The Premises

Can Sadie be charmed into submission?

Richard Mallinson tells a tale which involves a lady who is different.

'Don't go on about it, Sadie, for god's sake.'

'Why shouldn't I?'

'Because in this organisation, my dear, it is simply not done to - '

'Upset the applecart?'

'Well, I wouldn't have put it quite like that.'

'No, I don't suppose you would . . . But you knew when you hired me that I was different . . . You knew I'd speak my mind, didn't you? I'll tell you this, I never expected to find the level of idleness and incompetence that I've come across here in the short time that I've . . . Surely you must have known about it? And you must have realised I'd kick up a fuss?'

'Aagh . . . look, Sadie, I think the best thing we can do in the circumstances is to have a drink off the premises . . . Will you meet me in the Golden Cock at six-thirty? I'll be standing at the bar with a much-needed scotch in my hand.'


'Sorry I'm late,' she said.

'Don't worry ... My word, Sadie, you look stunning. What'll you have?'

'Oh, a much-needed gin and tonic, please.'

'Ha, ha, touche . . . Now, let's go and sit over there, shall we? You look so different with your hair down . . . Has anybody told you that you have beautiful - '

'Eyes? Yes, lots of married men.'

'Ha, ha, I'm divorced ... But let's talk about you. In my opinion-'

'Wait a minute, you're trying to charm me into submission, aren't you?'

'Good heavens, Sadie, whatever gave you that idea?'

'Well... it is a possibility, isn't it?'


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