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Laugh With Lisa: Killing The Flowers

Lisa DeMarco brings another gag or the broad-minded.

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, “Ma’am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag.”

“Oh, really? Darn it,” said the little old lady. “I’d better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer.”

“Well, now, not so fast,” the officer said. “Where did you get all that money? You didn’t steal it, did you?”

“Oh, no, no,” the old lady said. “You see, my back yard is right next to a golf course. A lot of golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know.Then I thought, why not make the best of it?”

So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thingy through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, “Okay, buddy, give me $20 or off it comes.”

“Well, that seems only fair,” the officer laughed. “OK.Good luck! Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?”

“Not everybody pays.”

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